Loar's resolution

Loar sighed, looking up at the night sky, somewhere in the forest not far from camp. It had been a whole day since he had first joined the Bandits with help from a fellow psycho named Saiko. This was Loar’s second chance to have a family, and have an older saber who would care for him…but deep down, in his heart, he didn’t trust his luck. He felt like one day, sooner or later…he’d make the same mistake that he had that one fateful day that cost his parents their own lives. He feared he’d be disobedient…or run off foolishly in a playful trance and not be aware of any sort of danger until it was upon him. He didn’t WANT to be responsible for another death…well, another death that included one who had helped him and seemed to care about him…He laid his head down, ears lowering as he sniffed the air, closing his eyes and letting the grass tickle his chin. He intended to stay out of the camp…just for the night…while he sorted through his thoughts. Would it have been easier for everyone if he had gotten killed instead of his parents? Did Saiko ever feel he was a burden on him? He had no idea what the saber thought half the time…and he was too scared to ask, in fear he’d offend him and the saber would lash out…

Loar sighed, unsure if he even belonged here in the company of others. Look at what happened the last time he was in the company of others…it got them brutally murdered…and the only real loser…was all of them, his parents for losing their lives, Loar for losing his parents…and he didn’t even know much about survival…he was learning how to start hunting from his dad, and knew a clever trick from his mom on how to break bones and get to the delicious marrow inside…but he was still learning…he was just a KID…how had he been expected to make it all on his own at such a young age? He was honestly surprised he’d made it as far as he had before running into the saber that took him in…but…he felt it was too good to be true, like a dream. After so many terrible things happening to him in life…was the goodness of it now like a mirage? Something that wouldn’t truly be there, no matter how hard he worked for it, or how far he went to get to it?

His ears twitched, and he turned to see Saiko, frowning before laying his head down. Saiko frowned, lying next to him. “Wha’cha doin’ out ‘ere, laddie?” The older saber questioned softly. Loar grunted, looking away. “Ay, no need ta do that, laddie…” Saiko mumbled, nudging him. “Wha’s wrong?” Loar sighed. “…I’m not going to be left alone, am I?” The cub asked, looking at the older saber. Saiko chuckled, shaking his head. “’fraid not.” Loar took a deep breath, closing his eyes. “…I guess…I just miss my parents…and…with you gnivas me from the water…and…taking me in…I’m worried something will happen, and…I’ll lose you…like I lost THEM.”

Saiko frowned, then chuckled. “Tha’ all? Lis’n, laddie, wha’ever hap’ned, I know it’s not easy bein’ alone…and ya were alone a while b’fore I found ya…but…ya won’t lose me…not tha’ easily…I may not be right all tha’ time, but that do’sn’t mean ya’ll lose me....” He said, cuffing Loar lightly on the ear. Loar let out a slight growl, then looked down. “…I’ve been losing more and more sanity ever since they left…yet you still want to help me?” Saiko smirked, responding fairly easily. “I ain’t yer norm’l sab’r, laddie…I’m go’ng insane too…whatev’r happ’ned, or will happ’n, I’ll stay ‘round…” He said, then yawned, laying his head down. “…like now…I’m not le’ving…ya jus’ go’ta r’memb’r that no mat’r what.” Loar looked at his paws, his claws flexing slightly before he smirked softly, yawning as he made a bold motion, laying his head on the older saber’s shoulder, trying not to seem tired.

Saiko rolled his eyes, seeing past Loar's act. “Ay…Go ta sleep, lad…” Loar blinked, then obediently started closing his eyes, secretly glad that the older cat stayed with him. “…I’ll never disobey you…esimorp…” He mumbled, and with that, drifted off to sleep…hoping he’d keep his resolution true. He didn’t want to lose anyone else because of stupid decisions or being disobedient…and even if he did…it WASN’T going to start with Saiko…